1. Is this your agreement?

2. Do you believe it treats both of you fairly?
(Keep in mind you may not like all of the agreement, but overall, do you believe, under the circumstances as they exist today or at filing, that it is fair)

3. Do you believe there was full financial disclosure?
(E.g., have you both filled out financial declarations? If not, do you believe you are sufficiently aware of the other’s income, assets and debts to be able to say that you believe the agreement to be fair?)

4. Did you enter it freely and voluntarily?
(Keep in mind that you may not like all of the agreement, however, did anyone hold a gun to your head to make you enter into it?)

5. If there are children, do you believe it to be in their best interests?

6. Were you under the influence of alcohol, drugs, or anything that would impair your ability to understand what you have entered into?

7. Are you asking the Court to approve this agreement and make it the Court’s Order?

    a. And in doing so, you are waiving your right to have a trial on these issues, where you could testify, call witnesses, submit evidence, and have the Court decide these issues? You understand that if that happened, you could come out better on some things and worse on others?

9. You also understand that once the agreement is approved it will become an Order?

10. If you willfully violate an Order you could be held in contempt and there are sanctions associated with that, including up to one year incarceration, up to 300 hours of community service, up to $1500 fine, and payment of the other party’s attorney fees and costs.

11. You understand that if approved, the Order will become final? As such, the division of property and debt are final?

12. If alimony is waived as part of your agreement, that such waiver is final.

13. That support-related issues may be revisited if there is a substantial change in circumstances unless your agreement states otherwise.

14. That custody arrangements, if children are involved, are also subject to modification in the future if there is ever a substantial change in circumstances affecting them.

If your case also involves a divorce on a one year continuous separation, the following questions will be asked:

1. Usually the Court will ask you, prior to starting the hearing, whether there is any possibility of reconciliation
2. When did you separate
3. Have you remained separated continuously since that time, without reconciliation or cohabitation
4. are you asking the Court to grant you a divorce based upon a one year continuous separation

Your Witness on a One Year Separation Divorce (this should be someone who comes to your home regularly and has first-hand knowledge that you have been separated for more than one year, such as a friend, relative or neighbor):

1. How do you know the party(ies)
2. How long have you known the party(ies)
3. Did you hear them testify that they separated around (date)
4. does that dound accurate to you?
5. Are you close to the party(ies)
6. If they had reconciled, do you believe they would have told you?
7. To your knowledge, have them remained separate and apart since that time
8. Have you been to their home on a regular basis over the past year
9. During any of those times, have you seen anything to indicate that they were residing together
10. To your knowledge, have they in fact been separated for more than one year

If your maiden or former married name is being resumed, you can expect the Court or your attorney to ask you questions similar to the following:

1. Do you desire to resume the use of your maiden or former married name?
2. Are you doing so to avoid creditors?
3. Have you filed bankruptcy in your current name?
4. Are you doing so to avoid criminal prosecution?
5.  Are you aware of any warrants out in your current name?
6. Have you had your driver’s license suspended in your current name?
7.  Are you listed with the state for abusing or neglecting children?
8.  Are you under an order to pay support (alimony/child support) in your current name?
9. Are you on any terrorist watchlist?

The Court or other counsel may always have additional questions.

Please be sure when you review your proposed Order that the spelling of the entire name (including middle name) is accurate.

In obtaining “affidavits” the Declarant (person giving the statement) should provide the information indicated below. All affidavits should be double-spaced, typed, signed, and notarized, and should be based on the individual’s first-hand observations and not hearsay.

If preferred, you may also write or have witnesses write affidavits and forward them to me prior to your hearing for review, comments. They will be emailed back and will then need to be printed, signed and notarized.

For your convenience, and that of your witnesses, we have notaries in our office.

1. 1.  Their name, relationship if any to the parties, length of time they have known the parties. (I.e., I, Declarant, have been a good friend of Mary for approximately 10 years since we met at work. I have known John since they got married and attended their wedding”. OR “I, Declarant, have been John’s stepmother since marrying his father 3 years ago”.
      
      
   2. They should also indicate the amount of contact they have with the parties and if a custody dispute, the amount of time they have observed the parties with the children (i.e.,: As their neighbor, I am at John and Mary’s house approximately 3-4 times a week or talk to them outside approximately 3 or 4 days a week for 20-30 minutes at a time”. OR: “ Although I live in Tennessee, we vacation together with our families every July for a week and spend the Christmas holidays together”. OR: “I see John at work every day and his family at the holiday party and company picnic twice a year”.
      
      Please note: the less the person has contact with the parties, the less impact their statements usually have, especially in the custody arena unless they have observed some serious behavior.
      
      
   3. The party should indicate what they have observed, as opposed to being “conclusory”. In other words, saying John or Mary is a good parent is not what we are looking for. We want the Declarant to provide their observations to the Court so that the Judge reaches the conclusion that John or Mary is a good parent.
      
      Examples:
      
      Conclusory:
      “John is active with his children.”
      
      Better:
      “John coaches his son’s soccer team every fall, and has gone camping with and actively supervised his son’s boyscout troop. I see him in their yard approximately 2 days a week when the weather is nice playing catch.”
      
      Conclusory:
      “Mary is concerned about her children’s education”.
      
      Better:
      “Mary began reading to her son prior to his starting kindergarten, teaching him letters, numbers, colors and shapes. I have personally observed her ensuring he does his homework on many occasions when I have stopped by during the week. I have personally observed her son go to Mary, not John, when he has a question about his homework”
      
      Conclusory:
      “John teaches his children responsibility”
      
      Better:
      “I have observed John teach his children responsibility by asking them if they have finished their homework and requiring them to do so before they begin playing their video games. He has also gently reminded them about feeding their dog and changing the hamster’s cage”.
      
      
   4. In custody cases: Other important matters that should be brought out and developed by persons with knowledge: which parent is more involved on a day to day basis with getting the child up, getting the child ready for school, transporting child to activities and school and doctor appointments, attending PTA meetings; enrolling, attending and cultivating the child’s activities (sports, musical, religious, social clubs); choosing, setting and taking the child to doctor appointment s for regular check ups and for sickness or illness; if the child has any specific medical problem, which parent has the most knowledge of the matter and knowledge of how to care for the problem (i.e., breathing machines, feeding tubes, insulin shots); does either parent have any special gifts or knowledge that makes them the better parent? Does either parent have any specific defects or problems that make them the lesser choice (i.e., criminal record, drug use, alcohol abuse, mental illness, suicide attempts, anger problems directed to the child or parent in the presence of the child), lack of patience with the child, cursing around or at the child, or belittling the child (you’re stupid, you don’t know anything, you’re fat, etc.”
      
      Also, since separating or in anticipation thereof, has either party acted in such a manner which is not in the child’s best interests, i.e., pulling the child out of school early, putting the child in the middle of verbal or physical altercations, cutting of utilities or other financial support for the child, exposing the child to immoral activity.
      
      
   5. Regarding fault based matters in divorces: the 3 fault grounds are adultery, physical abuse and habitual drug use or drunkeness
      
      If the person does not have first-hand observations of any of the above, then most likely they know what they know from hearsay. Hearsay is not allowed in affidavits. However, if the at-fault party has admitted to any of the fault grounds, that is an “admission against interest,” which is admissible. These can be used also in the custody-dispute cases, i.e., if a parent has admitted that they feel they are not patient with the children, that they are not a good parent, or the like.
      
      Adultery: Obviously, most witnesses are not going to have personally observed the at-fault party having sexual relations. The 2 elements of proving adultery are:
      
      
      1. Likelihood or propensity of the party to commit adultery: them being seen out in public, openly affectionate (hugging, kissing, holding hands). Other indicia: copies of emails, love letters, receipts for flowers or jewelry or intimate products not used in the marriage, cell phone bills reflecting high amounts of contact and at unusual hours (late at night when not at work)
         
         
      2. Opportunity: spending the night, by themselves, or at least several hours alone in private
         
         
      Physical Abuse: must be enough to put the person in reasonable fear of life or limb.
      
      Habitual drunkenness: How much, how often, DUIs, missing work, medical or other issues relating to alcohol use.
      
      
   6. Address financial concerns and property issues, such as use and possession of home, vehicle(s).

If the biological parents are in agreement to change the name of a child, it is considered uncontested, and the name change will typically be granted. However, the Court still requires the appointment of a Guardian ad Litem to represent the child’s interests, which results in additional cost.

If the parents are not in agreement to change a child’s name, for example, an unwed mother gives the child her surname and father is seeking to have the name changed to his surname, then the matter is contested.

When seeking to change a child’s surname, South Carolina law requires consideration of the following nine factors to determine if changing a child’s name is in the child’s best interest:

• the length of time the child has used the present surname;
• the effect of the proposed change on the preservation and development of the child’s relationship with each parent;
• the identification of the child as part of a family unit;
• the wishes of each parent;
• the reason the petitioning parent states for the proposed change;
• the motive of the petitioning parent and the possibility the child’s use of a different name will cause insecurity or a lack of identity;
• the difficulty, harassment, or embarrassment the child may experience if the child bears a surname different from that of the custodial parent;
• if the child is of age and maturity to express a meaningful preference, the child’s preference; and
• the degree of community respect associated with the present and proposed surnames.

The primary case in South Carolina on this issue is Mazzone v. Miles, 341 S.C. 203, 532 S.E.2d 890 (Ct.App. 2000).As indicated above, in cases in which a child’s name is being changed, the Court requires the appointment of a Guardian ad Litem, which is a neutral third party, usually an attorney, to represent the child’s interests.This person will typically conduct an independent investigation and report back to the Court on the issues at hand.The Court will allocate the fee of the Guardian between the parties if contested